The Trouble with Love
by dreamerdoll
Summary: Kel tells Joren she loves him, but he denies that he loves her in return, though her really does. Now Joren has to figure out how to win the woman he loves back. KJ
1. Default Chapter

Prologue:  
  
She's gone. She isn't coming back. Echoed a voice in his head. And it was all his fault. He had hurt her. Hurt her too much to be forgiven for it. Why? Why did he have to do that? He had loved her so much, but he had to go off and do that.  
  
He remembered the conversation perfectly.  
  
They lay on his bed, her head on his chest, both breathing heavily.  
  
"I love you." She had told him, looking into his icy blue eyes.  
  
He hadn't been expecting it. Oh, he had loved her, but he certainly couldn't admit it.  
  
"This is just a fling. You don't mean anything to me." He answered, voice harsh. He was afraid of the feelings he had for her. That was the only reason he could think of for saying that to her.  
  
She hadn't said anything. Instead, putting on her Yamani mask, she got off the bed and, pulling on her clothes, walked out of the room and into the dark hallway, not looking at him once.  
  
She had not said anything to him. It had been a week. He felt if it went on any longer, he would die. He couldn't stand the blank look that came over her features when he tried to speak to her, or when she noticed him watching her.  
  
He was used to her smiling at him, giving him a loving look. He couldn't stand the mask. It killed him. He had loved her so much! Not the Lump, who hid her feelings, but the remarkable, passionate woman that he had spent time with. The woman that he loved.  
  
He, Joren of Stone Mountain, was in love with the girl who used to be his worst enemy.

* * *

Okay, the first few sentences came to me suddenly while I was working on something else. I had thought it was going to make it another K/N, but as I was typing, it became a K/J. No idea where it came from.  
  
So, did you like? Hate? I need reviews! And I know that it's really short. I am very bad about that. Sorry!!! Well, if you liked, I will soon have another chapter out. If you didn't, oh well, I'll still have another chapter out. But I hoped you liked it.  
  
Review, Review, Review 


	2. Chapter One i am really original, i know

Chapter One:

Joren knocked on her door. He was sick of this. He wanted her with him again.  
  
She opened it, a smile on her face, until he saw who stood there. She pulled on her mask, and Joren silently cursed. Why did he always have to do that to him?  
  
"My I help you, Sir Joren?" She asked, though her voice was emotionless.  
  
"Yes. I need to talk to you." He answered, trying not to loose his temper. He couldn't. That wasn't the way to get her back.  
  
"I have a lot of work to do, and can not be bothered right now. If you will excuse me." She bowed politely before quietly shutting the door in his face.  
  
His shoulders drooped. She didn't want to talk to him. She didn't want to even look at him. What was he supposed to do? Find another way.  
  
He walked back to his room, thinking of what he could do.

* * *

Three weeks later, Joren still hadn't been able to talk to her. Anytime he tried, she had said she was busy and left. Still, he continued to try. Maybe if she saw how much he was trying to talk, she actually would let him, he thought. He was wrong.  
  
He watched out the window. A figure was taking a large horse out of the stables. Suddenly, he recognized the horse, and the person mounting it. Kel. He hurriedly grabbed his coat and made his way out of the room, thinking that this would be his chance.  
  
After he had saddled his horse, Joren asked a stable hand if he knew where she had gone. Coins exchanged hands and the man told him that the lady knight had ridden out on the path into the Royal Forest.  
  
He followed the path, but she wasn't on it. He cut off the road, watching for any movement. He didn't want to miss her. Still, she was no where to be seen.  
  
You arent ever going to find her in this bloody forest. Part of his mind said, but he ignored it. He was going to find her, if it was the last thing he did.  
  
He continued to search, and finally came to the river. There she was, sitting with her feet dipped in the water, her shoulders shaking.  
  
Suddenly, he realized what was going on. She was...she was crying! He was shocked. He had never seen her cry, not in all the time he had known her. He didn't know it was possible.  
  
Joren didn't know what to do. So, he did the only thing he could. He left, as quietly as he came.

* * *

Joren lay in his room, thinking of what he had seen. It hurt him, to see her like that. And it was his fault. It almost killed him, knowing that he had done that to her. And he didn't know how to fix it. She wouldn't let him talk to her!  
  
Finally, he got to his feet. She had to listen to him. And he would make her.  
  
He made his way to the indoor practice courts, guessing that was where she was. He was right. She was practicing on a dummy. He walked over and loudly cleared his throat to get her attention.  
  
She turned around. Before she could walk away, he asked, "Would you like to duel?"  
  
She nodded her head slightly in agreement and followed him to get practice swords.  
  
They began. It was a close match, but Kel won. Joren wasn't surprised at all. She was both swift and strong, a deadly combination. Of course, he was too, but she was still better.  
  
They both stood, hands on knees, breathing hard. Joren looked up. Her soft brown hair was falling out of the sloppy bun she had it in and curling around her face.  
  
"Good fight." He commented.  
  
She looked up into his eyes. "Thanks." She mumbled before turning away.  
  
He reached out a hand and gently touched her shoulder.  
  
She jumped at the touch and turned quickly around.  
  
"Kel, could we please talk? Just for a few minutes?"  
  
"No, Joren." She sighed before once more turning and walking away from him.  
  
He let out a growl. Why couldn't he get this right?

* * *

The end of chapter one. So, how was it?  
  
Oceanspike-Thanks! I had to do a J/K. I love them so much. Hope you liked the chapter.

Nolee of Stone Mountain-Good, you should love me. J/k. I love K/J K/N and K/D fics. However, I hate Raoul/Kel fics (bad images _ugh_) and Kel/Cleon fics (he's a jackass)  
  
Miamouse-Thanks, im glad you liked it. They do make life interesting, huh?  
  
Rosie eisoR-In later chapters, an explanation will come out. Or I might make a prequel. I'll do something to explain. Of course she doesn't beg! Can you imagine the lady knight on her knees begging someone! Gods, that would be bloody awful. I don't like it when people make her all vulnerable and needy. Its just, well, not how she is. And I could never make Joren gush over anyone. He's not that kind of person. Hell, im not the kind of person who writes about someone gushing. I really really hate summaries, and am rather terrible at them. I was in a rather bad mood that day, too. I will, of course, change the summary when I can think of a suiting one. Usually the summaries are the first things I write. I was actually not planning on posting this story yet, but oceanspike was leaving, and I wanted her to read it, so I had to post it without reading it through to check for mistakes. Sorry about that. Long chapters I am not really good at, but I will, of course, try.  
  
PsychoLioness13-Thanks. It was after his ordeal. I know he was supposed to die, but, well, it would be weird to have her sleeping with him when she was what, 16? And besides, if she loves him, he cant die! That would be sooo sad!!!  
  
Pinky-thanks. Glad you liked. Stupid Joren was more what I was thinking, but I do feel sorry for him. Yes, it does. I continued it, by the way! Actually, I was just finishing this chapter when I posted the prologue.  
  
Seastar-Thanks, I'm glad you like them. As soon as I can think of another, I will of course write more. I need a challenge. I am actually a member of WLD, and have been for the past month or so. I first started going to it about three months ago, actually, but didn't join right away. However, I have yet to post any stories there. Chocolate strawberries...yumm... By the way, what is your s/n on it?


	3. Letters

Chapter Two: Letters  
  
Joren pulled the folded piece of parchment off the door, curious. Only Kel left notes for him, and for some reason, he doubted it was from her. Slowly, he opened it.  
  
_Send her a letter._  
  
He checked for a name attached, but there was nothing besides the small note. He couldn't even recognize the handwriting. He had no clue who could have written it. But Joren knew very well who the person was talking about. Kel.  
  
He had thought about that, of course, but he had thought that it would be too impersonal. Well, he had tried everything else. He may as well try this.  
  
Sitting down at his desk, he chewed on his quill, wondering what to write. After much thinking, he came up with something presentable.  
  
_Dearest Kel,  
  
I need to apologize for what I said. I make no excuse for myself except to say that I do love you, more than anything, I just didn't know how to express my love. I am so sorry for being the cause of any pain you may have felt. Please forgive me.  
  
Love always,  
  
Joren  
  
_While it was rather short, it told her what it needed to. He just prayed to the Gods that she would forgive him.  
  
He walked out into the hallway and walked silently to her rooms and put the note on her door. There was a noise behind him. He hurried to an alcove, worried that it was Kel.  
  
He watched from his hiding spot as she and her friends walked down the hallway. When they got to her door, she took the note from it, a puzzled expression on her face. As she read, her frown deepened, until finally, she smiled slightly.  
  
From beside her, Neal's voice questioned, "Who is the letter from?"  
  
"No one." She answered, giving her best friend a large smile as she tucked the note into her pocket. Her friends left, and she closed the doors to her room.  
  
Joren gave a sigh of relief. He hadn't wanted to be caught.  
  
He was tired from the day's events and wanted to go collapse in his bed, but he waited several more minutes, wanting to make sure the halls were empty. Joren walked slowly back to his room, thinking over what he had said in the letter. He had meant every word of it. He did love her, so much. But he had been afraid of what he felt, of what they had. He had never experienced love before, and it frightened him.  
  
As he opened his door, a piece of parchment fell to his feet. He picked it up, wondering if it was from his advice giver.  
  
_Nice_  
  
He shook his head, bemused. Whoever this person was, he had to be keeping pretty close tabs on the blonde knight.  
  
Joren walked into his room, and, instead of going straight to bed, as he had earlier planned, picked up the book Kel had given him for his birthday and began to read. He had never even looked at it before then. It was really quite interesting. They were all stories and ballads of knights in battle.  
  
A knock sounded on his door, startling him.  
  
Kel stood in the hallway, wrapped tightly in her soft blue robe. He opened the door to admit her. She stood, uncomfortable for a moment, before finally reaching up and wrapping her arms tightly around his neck. He stiffened for a moment, then wrapped his arms tightly around her waist, hugging her back.  
  
"I love you." He whispered to her.  
  
"I love you, too." She said quietly into his neck.  
  
Joren smiled. He, of course, had a reason to smile. The woman he loved had forgiven him, and someone had thought he had done it right. There was much to be happy about. When he fell asleep, Kel in his arms, the smile was still on his face.

* * *

I know, very short chapter. Well, I hope you liked it. I promise to add another very very soon. And thank you everyone for your wonderful, helpful advice. I needed it.

miamouse- Thanks. yeah, it is kinda like that. its one of my problems.

nolee-good. dont love me. i love k/j too. cleon is such a jerk! hate him!!! k/r is very very very wrong. no, i didnt need to hear that. sorry about the acknowlegement thing. how remiss of me to realize that yours is shorter. and dont threaten me like that. it is very mean. and you better write more. and i do try to make your acknowledgements longer. k/ns are awesome, too, btw. i dont mind yuki really, its just, well, kel's better. anyway, you said in another review oceanspike was mad at me. why?

pinky-thanks. id avoid him too. he hurt her. i got them together. i hate sad endings too.

alaana-wannabe- thank you sooo much!!!!! i like reading from jorens pov. its interesting. i know, very short. i updated later than i meant. ive had it done for a while. sorry!!!

Wake-robin- i knw. i feel awful for them.

Allimba-thanks!

SeaStar-thanks. i love k/d too. i love WLD. its so cool!!! whats your s/n on there? ill try and write more, i swear! just dont cry!!!!! i like to write romance the most. tamora pierce. usually dom, but i love k/n fanfics too. i really got into one of the ones im writing. i love chocolate strawberries...

chicken-puffs-i didnt! so sorry!

Lilliana Rose- yeah. i love k/ds too. more than anything! thanks!

kerowyn-dawnfire- nolee of stone mountain. i know, discusting, isnt it? she says its a turn on. disgusting.

TheWildMage-thanks! glad you liked! i swear ill try!

Aevum-i wont i swear. and i will write more.

TI-Ti- thanks. i will defenantly try. i know what you mean, of course. no offense taken.

Kore Yan- i know, he should have. glad you liked!

PsychoLioness13-glad you liked. i think its very ooc, personally.

Keri-glad you like. i really like k/j fics.

oceanspike-glad you liked! so glad your back! or at least reviewing and (hopefully very soon) updating!

Imperfectionist;D-= omg!!!!!!!! i cant believe your reviewing me! this is soo cool! sorry, hyper. so glad you liked! i will certainly try to add more detail. its something im very awful at. i swear i'll continue! thanks so much!

misk-glad you liked it. nope, he hasnt. dont think he ever will.


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